what was I thinking??

right about now I am wondering why I thought applying for residencies was a good idea just a few weeks ago… it is a lot of work, it costs money, it requires me to put myself out there as an artist where I am not very happy being, and of course there is the high probability of rejection. I had to take new pictures of some work in progress, and I discovered it’s not terribly photogenic and since people have already written my references (funny how what I thought would be the MOST difficult part, persuading people they wanted to write a reference for me turned out to be the easiest part of all) and efficiently mailed them and everything I guess I am going to have to mail my woefully inadequate self  in… and suffer the consequences.I am not feeling confident about any part of this process, oh well I’ll let you know how it turns out if I am brave enough and honest enough to admit failure later in the year. On a related note I also have calls for two shows I want to enter sitting on my desk, and I find myself equally reluctant to send in those applications too. I am feeling fragile I guess! So to alleviate all this fear of rejection I have also decided to participate in Art house’s sketchbook project along with Sheree and Jafabrit, I’ll post some images of that work here when it’s further along. In the meantime here is the un-photogenic work in progress…grrr



2 thoughts on “what was I thinking??

  1. Hey, thanks for swinging by and commenting on my photos. I haven’t had any dinner, it’s past my bedtime and I’m still at work so I can’t do your writing justice. Just thought I’d stop by and say hi and that I’ll be back when more brain cells are working.

  2. ugh I know the feeling about rejection. I started off the new year not winning the governors award that so many people had kindly nominated me for (unbeknownst to me). I was chuffed I was nominated but it was still hard to not win. And the grant my friend and I had applied for was rejected. Oh poo!!!!!!!

    But I have been having fun with this sketchbook project and I hope you will too.

    I can see why you are having probs with photographing your work in progress, it is very delicate and beautiful but I suspect has to be seen, walked around and touched. Hum what about video!

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